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Trevor and Bob and Bob's girlfriend loved to play games...one of their favorites was fart lighting..the 3 were the greatest fart lighters on this side of Omaha, Nebraska......one day after a beer drinking contest..it was 2 in the afternoon..all 3 were plastered off there asses on this fine Monday afternoon. It was Bob's girlfriend Suzy's idea to light some farts..seens that she had some chili earlier and alot of beer..both gave her some gas...the guys being men and all..took her up on that challenge....they felt they had as much gas as she did...So Suzy started then she farted..(hey that kind of rhymes..I'm a poet and didn't even realize that I was)..anyways...it blasted..."just a warm up, next one is going in flames" so Trevor let one go and it was a small one...then Bob's turn and it squeeked..Bob was too drunk to care anyways..but Trevor was not gonna get beat in a fart lighting contest by a petite girl....so Suzy had Trevor put the lighter up her ass..being the gentleman he is and flick the lighter to flame and then she let out a Ffflupityberrrpff...then WHOOSH what a flame and she even had some more left for the smell
Fact: when you light your farts it burns the smell
So now it was Trevor's turn..he waved away her fart smell to let some air ..just in case his fart would leave a smell..and then took the lighter up to his ass and then lit . Feert whoosh...Suzy laughed "you fart like a girl" Trevor crinkled his eyebrows and said "just warming up" they both looked to Bob.."Bob its your turn" said Suzy..but Bob was passed out.."Looks like it's you and I" said Trevor..and then Suzy with evil grin and let out a little wind...and said "You're on" Trevor went ahead and let another one loose into the lighter...Whooooosh
"Not bad Trev, But try this one on for size" she pulled up her skirt to expose her panties and then said 'allow me" grabbed the lighter out of Trevor's hand and put it up her ass...then BRRRRAAPPWHOOOOOOOSH "damn" said Trevor...thats nothing....but then a little bit of her smell reached his nose...."pugh, that one stank, girl"..said Trevor..." I'm telling you Trev..the beer gives it the nice stinky smell"
Then Trevor grabbed the lighter and squeezed out a ppt..but no whoosh.. Suzy just laughed...Trevor was now determined...then Suzy lit one towards him.. Ferwhoosh "thats just a little one..oh a big one to you Trev" Suzy said. Trevor was squeezing and squeezing to build up a giant one..he would not let this girl get the best of him......then all of a sudden he felt it..the big one..this one would light up the whole back yard...Trevor said.."Suzy hand me the lighter please" then pulled down his pants and underwear and put the lighter up there..and felt it build up....(instead of sound affects..I'll explain) The backyard lit up ..it was like lightning...the sound broke the sky...Suzy ducked low..it was beutiful..scientist belive that this was the day in history that the night turned to day in a matter of seconds...it gave the ambiance of the end..was it a comet? was it a ufo? no it was a big ball of fire and behind that was good ole happy Trevor and underneath was Suzy with a frown...the flame was dying down..then from the impact it swooped up Trevors colon..and his guts exploded...BOOOM!!!
Goodbye Trevor.
Trevor felt nothing he was floating in a mass of darkness...am I blind? His emotions were at ease..he just knew he was floating..he began to build up.."Oh my God" said Trevor "I'm dead" he began to float a bit more..the only thing he noticed besides bliss was that he smelled real bad....he couldn't handle it..then he noticed a tunnel of light..and his soul was floating in a quicker pace to that light hole in the distance.. Meanwhile Suzy as she was sobering up..was trying to wake Bob up "Bob, Trevor is dead wake up" But Bob was passed out..he was on Tilt. Suzy felt a bit more gas in her..so she figured a way to wake up Bob..she pulled her panties down and put a lighter to her ass and pointed her ass to Bobs face..and began to squeeze
Trevor was reaching the tunnel in a fast pace it was magnificent..it was like a roller coaster ride faster then ever..even the one at the local fair...."I'm going to heaven" then the light got bigger and brighter....and then he shot through
WHOOOOSH.."Hell?'
The end
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